A few days ago my supervisor requested a meeting. This was usual as the university prepares for the Fall Term. However, what was presented to me was completely unexpected.
My boss encouraged me to consider taking a non-teaching position within the department. I was shocked and slightly offended. I took offense immediately and everything thing I did wrong or submitted late ran through my mind. Becoming defensive and guilty blocked any other opportunity the other position would offer.
As usual, my mind got stuck on every possible negativity this offer presented. All these assumptions were created by me. I barely heard the incentives and more money possibilities. As my boss and I ended the conversation, I paused and breathed it all in. Who could I go to and say the things I couldn't say to my boss? It was an early afternoon on a work day. No one was free to text. Of course, my laptop was open and my Facebook page stared back at me. Instantly, I went to the Chat and hit up a friend and then my pastor.
My friend’s initial response was all positivity and excitement, "That’s great Crystal, you’ll have more time for your business like you wanted!" She typed and ended with a happy face.
I thought about her words and felt a tinge of sadness. In the rush of my offense, I completely forgot about DreamWriterInk! and the lists of new customers I had acquired during the summer months.
Minutes later my pastor responds with something similar and made perfect sense,... as he usually does. Reminding me of my previous complaints and my sudden actions. He didn't guilt me but reminded me of perspective and the point of view I took.
As the days proceeded, my mind flipped back and forth. Common sense said, take the position, my pride said your goal is to become a Full Time Professor of English, my company cried, WHAT ABOUT ME?? Over the past two weeks, I've attempted to look at this situation from a variety of perspectives and for some reason, I've found peace in knowing my options have many options!!
My advice to you is to always USE PERSPECTIVE when presented with a fork I'm the road, given unexpected surprises, or told no:
1. Go to God for counsel FIRST!! DON’T be like me and respond off of your emotions. Take a minute and calm down then PRAY. Seek comfort, answers, and direction. I didn't do that. I took offense and looked for friends I knew/thought would support my feelings and derogatory thoughts.
2. Which brings me to point #2. Seek counsel from a wise person. A person that has succeeded when presented with a similar conflict. Note: I said they SUCCEEDED, not dive into a pity party with more Debbie Downers. My initial responses in Facebook DM shook me to realize the picture was bigger than what I perceived.
3. Stay purpose-minded. Throughout this entire ordeal, I rarely considered how a job change would benefit my company. My brain was stuck on getting tenure and health insurance. I was job-focused, not career or purpose-focused. God created me to write and be an author. Holding the title FT Professor has NOTHING to do with writing and publishing books. Sure, it could help but, it’s not the only way. God has shown me several times that DreamWriterInk! Writing & Publishing can and will sustain me and my writing dreams.
Changing your perspective can provide more harmony than expected. As God grows me, I've learned not just to be slow to anger but, to be super slow to stop jumping to conclusions and trust Him and His plans for your success and sanity!!
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